More hilarious things!
Xivilai upskirt!
That's probably more of a Deadra than you ever want to see, but frankly, I was disappointed. Tough guy like that, and THAT'S all that's under there? *scoffs*
Is he dead, or relaxing on the beach?
I'm...not too sure...O_o
Scandal of the Era!
Okay...so there was this party at Glarthir's house, right? And this guy kept giving me the eye. I recognized him as a city guard and thought he was going to arrest me because I had eaten before I got to the party (vampire here), and I was nervous. But he simply comes over and introduces himself. So, okay, I'd had a few swigs of Surielle Brother's and was looking for a good time...So, we end up back at Rosethorn. Now, between us walking through the door and the next morning, I have NO IDEA what happened.I remember letting Eyja off early and she tottered down to the basement and my guest and I headed upstairs, apparently. Ok, now...I have NO idea what went on, but all I knew was that the next morning, I had a killer headache, my shoulders and back hurt and there was a naked guy in my bed. What? What do me mean?! Of course I assumed the worst! There was a naked man in the bed with me!!! Now, to the best of my knowlege, I didn't DO anything...but when I prodded him awake and asked what was going on, he went crazy...Like, screaming crazy. Yelling and crying crazy...So, he went to jump out of bed, and tripped over the sheets and banged his head on the bedside table. He blacked out. I slipped out of bed and pulled some pants on, wondering what on earth to do now. As I looked around for some sort of aid that wasn't there, the guy comes to again, and starts threatening to have me arrested. Now, you can threaten my life, you can threaten my family, but you never, EVER threaten to have me arrested. So, as he was getting up and trying to head to the door, I grabbed my nearby Deadic dagger and stabbed him in the neck. He slumped against the bed where, thankfully, the blood didn't show so well. Then I thought..."what now?!" He was dead, naked, in my room. I couldn't very well drag him through the house into the basement, Eyja would lose it. She already suspects me of being a vampire, I think. (She seems to think "something's amiss"...) So, I wiped off my blade, put it back on the shelf...
and stuffed the corpse behind the bed. I'd take care of him later that night. I made the bed back up, and put Dyna (the claymore) back in her spot and left for the day...Vicolth Tallavay, the Jeff Dahmer of Cyrodill.